She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
