Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
