She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
