It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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