dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
