he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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