We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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