yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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