when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
50% drunk capacity currently
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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