Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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