dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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