Non-Jews are for practice
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
