someone threw a dead crab at me
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize