i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
