He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
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He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
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I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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