The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
