Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
