i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize