This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
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