Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
