I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
