I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
