insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Be still, my beating vagina.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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