I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
What a dumb baby whore.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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