Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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