office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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