Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
