I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
