she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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