I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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