Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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