Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
