Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
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