She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
