It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
