I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
