i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
