I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
