In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
this is an emotional support booty call
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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