Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I have post one night stand depression
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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