My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
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