I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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