she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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