Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
