There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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