It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
She told me I should be a condom model.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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