apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
