We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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