Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
He has the fingertips of a God
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