It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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