im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
